2005 for me!

I was going to do this on New Year's Eve, but... I decided to do it earlier.

This past year has been full of good times and bad times, I don't want to ever make it my cliche phrase, but... God is good when all else sucks.
***
My life in 2005 has been one that has twisted me into different directions and different modes, it has been a time for growth- spiritually as well as by way of maturity.
This year has been one in I have written a lot, perhaps even too much- but I rather write more than less. God has shifted my values and what I took for granted, He has also put some followers of Christ in my life that I hope to never let slip through the cracks.
One such friend I have made this year has been Chrissy
God is soooo good to me! Originally we met as friends online, by way of myspace, but since then I have met her in person and have done various things including going to the twisted 12 concert.
Learning that friendships (online) can lapse over into real life friendships has been amazing, she is a great source of Godly wisdom, I am glad to know her as a friend.
I am also thankful to God for the resources to go to Judson College; Finishing up my first semester there was great, I am thankful to God for the various friends I have made there as well. John and Jeff, and the older (experience wise) YouthMin majors. I thank God for Justin- Sadly he has graduated, but getting to know him and hanging out with him AND also praying with him... Wow! God is good.
I am also glad that I have gotten to know Stephanie; she has been the friend of my sister for a long time, but now... Now she is my friend as well!
We have had several open conversations in which we kept it real/authentic which... I am liking more and more, but to those I trust- in which I am learning to trust more people moreso.

I am thankful to God for healing me...emotionally of so much; I don't want to get into details, but I feel the changes that have taken place.
I am thankful for my practicum site- I am out at YoungLife Geneva- St. Charles site... It is great and Brent is an awesome site supervisor.

My last 'shoutout'... for now, is this:
I am thankful to glad for my professors and fellow classmates...especially Dating, Marriage and Sex. I have learned a great deal, in which I now know what I need to do to change! That is... the various roadblocks of generations past and present, in regards to my family. I thank God for Matt and Logan especially, just talking to them as well as their girlfriends has been a very good thing.

That's all I have to say...
for now!

God is good!
*thanks for being my friend Chrissy! God bless ya!*
[nv]

merry CHRISTmas!

well...it is Christmas!
the day followers of Christ celebrate the birth of Christ...
but i question how much...
alas! commercialism takes over so much that once was innocent and pure

and yet,
i wonder,

what can i do?
perhaps... perhaps i can work/invest in my friendships-

to make what i have into something better...

like removing the dross from gold makes it pure,

so to i wish to draw the dross out of my relationships and make them better...
***
where to start though,
that is another question...
i should start right away
and i am thinking i can do this with my friends out here

and back at Judson...when i go back to school.

so...
this is almost like a new years resolution,
but... i don't plan on breaking it.
:)
<3

happy birthday Jesus!

[nv]

Best CHRISTmas movie, ever!

I think I know what best Christmas movie is...
It's not National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation
It isn't The Christmas Story...

I believe it is the Passion of the Christ...
If you know why Jesus came to this earth in the first place, you'll understand: Jesus came to this earth to die for the sins of mankind... Jesus came to die for everyone, in which we can receive his free gift of salvation. By asking Jesus to dwell within our hearts and to become ruler of our life, we can live again when we die.

So while you're enjoying Christmas with you and yours, remember... Jesus came as fully man and fully God with the intent of dying for the sins of mankind... We may get great gifts, but he gave the greatest gift of all.
[nv]

I guess I am in the Christmas Spirit, I guess...

Well... i guess i am in the CHRISTmas spirit...i guess.

i mean, by my own accord i've played some Christmas music- albeit it has only been 2 songs; happy christmas (war is over) john lennon and winter wonderland; covered by styper...

i guess why it's been hard to get into the mode of Christmas is... materialism- i mean, i've already spent one evening trying to get out of naperville and it took over an hour! last night i had to drive through geneva and st. charles and that too took a long time...
*sigh* 'tis the rememberance of Jesus' birthday - bah humbug! it is more of a 'tis the time to BUY BUY BUY! get all the fricken crap that doesn't last forever and makes you your special someones friend for a whole 5 minutes... yes, i will be getting items... yes, i put up a Christmas list, yes...i got my Christmas shopping out of the way...for the most part... but i think the problem is that...

we have lost the focus; the direction on the compass points back to us instead of to others... it has also voided out Jesus... Christmas has become a comercialistic heretical thing: to add more insult to injury, a lot of people are saying "happy holidays" instead of Christmas. I have wished my Jewish friends Happy Channukah and they have wished me a Merry Christmas- see! it's not like we're going around trying to offend each other, we are not being PC about it, we are simply passing on a greeting based on religion. (even though Christianity is not a religion, but I'll blog about that some other day...)

Give me Christmas,
but don't give me the 'yeah-it-is-Christmas-but-I-need-this-stuff' spiel; I could tell you about what I've seen in this world, but then again... I too have too much stuff- this will change...sooner, not later.

Have a Merry CHRISTmas and a Happy New Year, but don't forget the reason in which we celebrate the 25th of December.

Going on by GOD's strength alone,
[nv]

never forget...a poem

\

never forget...
the ones you love,
the ones that slip between the cracks,
the ones who have died

don't forget...
the wars we face as a country,
the wars we face as individuals,
those that we maim,
those we call our enemies,
those we decide to bomb,
those we have bombed...

i have lived a rough life;
ups and downs- repeat.
GOD remains faithful-

he is the only thing that is balanced in my life;
all else is thrown to the chaotic winds of change
this is good and bad
and
so
in
conclusion-
life (for me)
is a catch-22
in which, GOD is the exception.
[nv]

Hungry for more of God...Chapter 4

Chapter 4

"This is certain, that a man that studieth revenge keeps his own wounds green which otherwise would hearl and do well." (Francis Bacon - page 45)

"The law of retribution is carved deeply into our hearts" (page 47)

"Yet if we're hungry for more in our Christian experience, we must recognize and deal with bitterness and the desire for revenge" (page 47)

"Bitterness blinds us and we don't see ourselves as we are" (page 49)

"Be careful, lest in fighting the dragon, you become the dragon" (Nietzsche - page 49)

"as we shall see, forgiveness leads to successful aging more often than does nursing old resentments" (Dr. George Vaillant - page 49)

"revenge licks the wound rather than allowing it to heal" (page 50)

"we don't see what bitterness is doing to us because satan is careful not to show us the total bill for our sin. instead he hides the high interest rate in the fine print and breaks down the consequences into monthly installments to disguise the cumulative effect of our bitterness" (page 52)

"of the seven deadly sins, anger is possibly the most fun. to lick your wounds, to smack your lips over grievances long past, to roll over your tongue the prospect of bitter confrontations still to come...in many ways it is a feast fit for a king. the chief drawback is that what you are wolfing down is yourself. the skeleton at the feast is you" (Frederick Buechner - page 52 and 53)

"Sometimes we don't see what bitterness does to us" (page 53)

"The bitter individual overlooks the fact that forgiveness is a gift not only for the offender, but the offended" (page 53)

"Forgiveness begins the work of liberating us from the pain and poison of the incident that wounded us" (page 53)

This chapter has really touched me...internally; i have a lot of bitterness and anger at a certain person in my life, i have forgiven him, but not completely... this is something i as an individual, needs to work out and get off my chest before it consumes me completely...
[nv]

Hungry for more of God...chapter 3

Chapter 3

"Our problem in evangelism is not that we don't have enough information- it is that we don't know how to be ourselves. We forget we are called to be witnesses to what we have seen and know, not what we don't know. The key is authenticity and obedience, not a doctorate in theology" (Rebecca Maley Pippert - page 33)

*questioning the "why"* "Why are you here?" (page 34)

*sharing the gospel* "...it can be done if one takes a good approach to a difficult situation. This is important because one aspect of being hungry for God is the desire to tell other people about him." (page 34)

"If our experience with God has left us hungry for more, we want to tell others about the Savior." (page 35)

"What shall I do? asks one...Why, do the first thing that comes to hand, but do get to work for your Master!...Some of the greatest enterprises have sprung from very little causes; the forest of the mightest oaks in the world was once only a handful of acorns. Oh, that we might all do that we can for Him who laid down His life for us, and who still continues to abide in us, to be our joy and our strength." (Charles Spurgeon - page 37)

"But we serve a Savior who multiplies the effect not only of a few loaves and fishes" (page 37)

"Telling what we know about God can be a liberated approach to witnessing because it means we don't have to make a full-scale presentation of the gospel in order to communicate something important" (page 37)

"Meeting felt needs is often the key which unlocks the opportunity to share Christ" (Joseph Aldrich - page 39)

"When you understand that in evangelism you're bearing witness to the God of the gap, it becomes less daunting." (page 42)

hungry for more of God...continued...

this is a really good book! my professor Dr. Rob Currie is a wonderful writer and professor as well...

here are some things i have pulled from chapter two:

"The Christian is at his sanest and wisest when he prays" - J.I. Packer (page 19)

"Sometimes life hurts too much" (page 20)

"heartache comes uninvited" (page 20)

"As for prayers that spring from the mouth and head only, God abhors them; He loves those that come deep from the heart" - Charles Spurgeon (page 23)

"Pour your pain into prayers and you'll pray with passion" (pages 23-24)

in regards to praying for someone or something in a non-calm scenario: "...it felt like a tug of war with Satan" (page 24) *i know the feeling*

"imagine the absurdity of my telling the devil what to do, like an ant bossing an elephant. but it makes a difference if the ant knows the zookeeper" (page 24)

"How much is at stake in your prayers?" - "Do you know what I often ask Christians, "What's the biggest thing you've asked God for this week?" I remind them that they are going to God, the Father, the Maker of the Universe. The One who holds the world in his hands. What did you ask for? Did you ask for peanuts, toys, trinkets, or did you ask for continents?" (Dawson Trotman - page 25)

"On still other occasions, God shows his power by going above and beyond what we ask. Once again, the display of his power in response to our prayers isn't limited to the specifics of our request" (page 28)

"[God]...He also displayed his might by teaching us to trust him, and by showing the beauty of his timing" (page 29)

***
Wow! What a great chapter! this book is really good...
[nv]

this week...so far...

it's been very rough...

just with dealing with a friend who has left for marine bootcamp and how my father is and isn't...
GOD remains good, i don't say this as a cliche phrase, but as something i see over and over in my ups-and-downs in life...
i
may
be
bent,
but
i
will
not
be
broken.

[nv]

mel...

may be gone, but the memories remain...

[nv]
*sad...but GOD will help me like he will help her..*

don't manipulate your love...a poem...

when you said

i love you

i felt manipulated...

why would you say what i want to hear

and yet...have no emotion behind it?

1 corinthians 13 lists actions of what love is and isn't

without love...i/you/anyone is nothing

i love you still

father dearest,

father distant...

but please, DO NOT ever use I LOVE YOU as a tool of manipulation...

to gain leverage,

to smooth over issues,

etc.
***

i shared with you

a painful past event

and

you seemed...apart.
come back, please
GOD make him come back,
i

wanted

a

father

and

i

still

want

one

robot man, ye who i have loved... a poem...

robot man

i love ye...

even when you are so detached from being real

even when you are no longer made of flesh, but of metal...

i wish that ye would come back,
there is life in your bones
and yet...you hide every resemblance of your human counterpart
***

GOD knows i want you back

it was bad enough to have

you seperated from me in

so many different ways

especially the father/son relationship we once had...

i am not giving up on you,

but the light at the end of the tunnel is no longer steady, it is flickering

GOD willing it doesn't burn out...

time for change...

well... this is it,
not that i am going to spill my guts out by way of blog,
but... i want to dialogue more with those who read my blog...
be in the process of making changes; about myself and others- in a positive way?
i
feel
like
neo
after
realizing
his task
"...he's beginning to believe" as morpheus said...
i want to get connected
with friends and family
it would be quite the experience...

time for change.
[nv]

off of school...yea!

well i am off of school for a month... in which i plan on spending time with the family and friends...
i am to look for a job while on my break, which i don't necessarily mind, but...i want to catch up on my sleep and also have some r and r time.i want to do so much, but i realize this time off will go by very quickly. GOD willing i will spend my time wisely, and i DO consider blogging a thing of time spent well...i may hook up with some people over my break from college, but it's purely social and it should be fun!

chao and GOD bless,
[n][v]
my myspace blog

rating my professors...

*note: this is not a rant/rave about how they've graded my papers/etc. it is simply me blogging about how much i enjoyed them as teachers, but more importantly, as humans...*

Rob Currie - this man was my intro. to psychology professor; he was a very lively fellow who always started off class with prayer and a joke or two... we learned Bible verses by way of song in his class, which was akward at first, but i enjoyed it emmensely! i have him for adolescent development in the spring. this man is someone who has a wonderful and caring heart...GOD bless Rob Currie!

Mrs. Sandberg - this woman was my pre-algebra and algebra teacher... i am not a good student of math; but with her as a teacher and the ALEKS program - wow! i am understanding math so much better now! she was very funny and helpful, she helped me understand math...i thank GOD for teachers who put in the extra effort to help students like me. GOD bless Mrs. Sandburg!

Victoria Kueker - She and Kim Budd led the practicum 1 class; she was a very nice person, but you had to make sure you caught her when she wasn't too busy, because communication lacked when she was busy with something at the same time i met with her... in the times i communicated with her when she wasn't busy, it was good times... just talking about life and what's to come and other things... GOD bless Victoria Kueker!

Kim Budd - She and Victoria Kueker taught practicum 1, but more importantly, she taught intro. to youthmin. She was a very good teacher and i learned a lot from her class; i admit, the books were chunky and full of material, but she made them understandable and classtime was always a good time. she is a melancholic like i am, which make communication easier in a way; i could relate some of my experiences as so, and she was a good listener and suggestor of books... GOD bless Kim Budd!

Brad Seeman - No one in our class poked fun at his last name, but we did say we had sex with our professor... being that i was in dating, marriage and sex with him... he was someone who would tell jokes that would make my classmates and i; "professor seeman!" just because they were funny...but in an akward way. i recommend his class to anyone, but it is a class that would be good to take with your boyfriend/girlfriend... meeting with him and talking to him in his office was great; he could relate to some of the things i have gone through and the genogram was a really big step for me...i now have some stronger tactics to take on what lies ahead in my dating and marriage. i think this was my second fav. class this semester, first being my intro. to youthmin class, but in this class, my peers and i got along very much, in which we want to have a class reunion ten years out! perhaps hosting it in his class while he teaches it; will be there with our spouses and kids- we may even joke (in truth) yeah...we had sex! because as some of us joke; finances bad! sex...good! GOD bless Brad Seeman!

Jim Townsend - This man was my old testament teacher; some people complained at his sense of humour, but i found it to be great! i loved how he would get into the origin of Biblical words and other such things... i have a different new testament teacher in the spring, but he made the Bible so much more enjoyable due to his knowledge and his sense of humour. GOD bless Jim Townsend!

*and that's all the teachers i've had this semester*
~fin~
///nv\\\

from the chicago tribune...

Think you know Narnia? Guide to C.S., `Chronicles'

By Robert K. Elder
Tribune staff reporter
Published December 8, 2005


C.S. Lewis (1898-1963), author of the seven "Chronicles of Narnia" books, was born in Northern Ireland and enjoyed a distinguished academic career, but did you also know:

- Clive Staples Lewis disliked his birth name, so he re-christened himself "Jacksie" circa age 4. As he grew older, friends called him "Jack."

- The Lewis family wardrobe is housed in the Marion E. Wade Center in Chicagoland's Wheaton College. It was hand-carved by Lewis' grandfather, Richard Lewis, in Northern Ireland in the mid-1800s, then shipped to Lewis' home outside Oxford in 1929. Visitors to the Wade Center are welcome to touch the wardrobe, but not climb into it. A sign reads: "The Wade Center assumes no responsibility for persons who disappear or are lost in the wardrobe."

- "The Chronicles of Narnia" is not a Christian allegory, Lewis argued, but rather a "supposal." In this case, "What if there was a world like Narnia that needed saving?" Aslan, the self-sacrificing lion of the series, serves as its Christ-figure.

- Lewis belonged to The Inklings, a group of literary types and academics in Oxford, England, during the 1930s and '40s. In Lewis' rooms at Magdalen College, Oxford, members read drafts of their work aloud on Thursday nights. Famous members include Lewis, "Lord of the Rings" trilogy author J.R.R. Tolkien and "War in Heaven" author Charles Williams.

- Also in the Wade collection at Wheaton College: The desk on which Tolkien wrote "Lord of the Rings."

- Tolkien and fellow academic Hugo Dyson helped convert Lewis to Christianity through their discussions of theology and myths. Christianity is the one truth myth, they posited, through which all the other myths reverberate and take themes -- particularly the death and resurrection of a god.

"They argued it's what all the myths point to, except in the case of Christianity it becomes historical fact," said Christopher Mitchell, director of Wade Center.

- The idea of a live-action movie of "The Chronicles of Narnia" didn't sit well with Lewis in 1959. In a letter to British Broadcasting Corp. producer Lance Sieveking, the author wrote: " . . . I am absolutely opposed -- adamant isn't in it! -- to a TV version. Anthropomorphic animals, when taken out of narrative into actual visibility, always turn into buffoonery or nightmare." He added that a "human, pantomime Aslan" would be "blasphemy."

He continued: "Cartoons (if only Disney did not combine so much vulgarity with his genius!) wld. be another matter."

The new live-action film "The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe" is produced, in part, by Walt Disney Pictures.

Given the technology of the day, says the Wade Center's Mitchell, Lewis feared the animals would look corny, and could not be treated with the proper dignity they deserved.

- During World War II, the Lewis family took in evacuee children from London while the German Luftwaffe conducted bombing raids on the city. The Pevensie children in "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe" are themselves evacuees.

- According to Lewis' brother Warnie, the youngest Pevensie child, Lucy, was based on Jill Flewett, one of the real evacuees hosted by the Lewis family. "She was described by Jack and Warnie as the closest person they'd ever met to a living saint. . . . " said Lewis' stepson Douglas Gresham in a recent interview.

- Flewett later married Clement Freud, the grandson of famed psychologist Sigmund Freud. Flewett became an actress using the name Jill Freud.

- In "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe," the children stay with Professor Kirke, who is a tribute to Lewis' academic mentor, W.T. Kirkpatrick. This same Professor Kirke shows up as Digory Kirke, protagonist of "The Magician's Nephew," the prequel to "Lion."

- Lewis loved and was inspired by the work of writer Edith Nesbit, author of such tales as "The Railway Children" and "Five Children and It." In her 1908 story "The Aunt and Amabel" a magical wardrobe serves as the entry point to another world.

- Despite their friendship, Tolkien didn't like Lewis' Narnia books. Marjorie Lamp Mead, co-author of "A Reader's Guide Through the Wardrobe" and associate director of the Wade Center, says the authors' views on fantasy literature were strikingly different.

"Tolkien's approach to created fantasy was to make a world so internally consistent . . . [that] you didn't have any reference points to take you out of the world. Lewis did more of a literary stew and he pulled things in from all over, including Father Christmas," she said. "For Tolkien that was disruptive and not consistent."

- Lewis died on Nov. 22, 1963, the same day as President John F. Kennedy and "Brave New World" author Aldous Huxley.

younglife!

this is where i am doing my practicum site for intro to youthmin; younglife geneva - though i am part of the st. charles east club

i love my practicum site!
GOD has blessed me with a great site supervisor, great co-workers, and students who come... it was akward for me to be in a non-church setting for the first two times i went to younglife, but GOD has placed it on my heart to minister to these high schoolers at this time in my youthmin career...

more details to come on such a cool organization; for those who work at younglife and for those who show up...GOD is good!
:::nv:::

last day of school/finals!

i am so stoked

to be off of school

even though when i come back

...

some friends will have graduated!

yeah, judson college has a graduation ceremony on saturday

and that means Justin D will be gone...
:(
such a funny guy

who i have gotten to know

and

with his leaving judson, i am saddened by his leaving.

***
he is someone i have come to enjoy talking to,

albeit, not that much lately...

so long judson (for a month)

and
so long justin.

more to come

i

need to prep for my old testament final; i've heard it's easy, but tests by osmosis doesn't happen for me...
chao and GOD bless

[n][v]

musically speaking...

i wonder...because my musical tastes these days is very random and very different; like DA, oldies, foreign music, hebrew hiphop, reggae, japanese pop, chinese pop, the pet shop boys, krafterwerk and others...
i like my taste in music, but sometimes people wonder why is he playing that stuff? like if my music tastes lack...? i lack words at this time, i'll blog later when i am free from this prison called homework/school in general

:) Jesus' birthday is almost here!

one more day of school/finals...

and then,

finished! for a month!

i am so tired

and

i tried to get some sleep earlier

but

my roommate opened the door and so i heard parodies of the wheel of fortune theme and day-o, me say day-ay-o, day light come and me wanna go home... so, i only got an hour of rest when i was shooting for 3...

the youthmin paper is complete;

11-12 pages of goodness,

hopefully a-good-grade kind of goodness,

i'll find out laters...

old testament

and

psychology

finals remain;

the psych. one seems easy

and with some more work the o.t. one will be easy as well!

i just decided to blog

so that i could let my

mind take a break and

then i'll get back to my

work until 10ish...when i plan on grabbing a shower and then going to bed.
[n][v]

talking to GOD...

I love talking to GOD- by praying, by reading the Bible, by singing to him (he likes my voice, i could care less), by being active, by being quiet, etc... i admit that sometimes i don't see him in my life; i see only pain and problems and i feel where is GOD? but He has shown that he is in everything; the good and bad, the sunny days and snowy days, when the sky is blue and when it is grey and overcast...i digress.

He is someone i can go to in any circumstance and he listens...
i don't hear angelic choirs when he responds,
his voice does not resound with a deepness that drives darkness away when he speaks to me;
he responds to me in the quietness...of my life and the natural quietness...
i guess that's why i love the outdoors;
because that is where i can talk to GOD
and
that is where i feel the closest to him...
[nv]

p.s. *Translation: Please turn off your cell phone, you do not need it to talk with God*

this is good...Republicans beware!

this is odd...funny...democratic. enjoy!





n*v

2 good things...

1.) i have finished my first final! dating, marriage and sex...it went very well and i was able to crank out 4 pages of notes...i feel i did very good on it; i hope my grade card reflects it!
2.) there were drawings last night for various things; an i-pod, i-tune gift cards, trivial pursuit, etc... and guess what? i won something! i do not win things often, but i won this time - i won...

ELF on DVD!
yea!
good times and a good day...
[nv]

today marks...

5 months without any meat! i know it's only 5 months, but if i am going to party, it may have to be at the 6 and 12 month anniversary...

it's not bad, going without meat- for me, at least... my roommate says he could not live without meat and then there's brian who in his 'military intelligent' mind says he would get a deer and eat it and...other stuff...

so, i can't complain about those who eat meat- i have come to enjoy not eating it; i am a teleological vegetarian... i should eat healthier as a vegetarian, but the food here is...limited for a vegetarian like me.
[nv]

voice of the martyrs - pray for - update

"When He opened the fifth seal, I saw under the altar the souls of those who had been slain for the word of God and for the testimony which they held. And they cried with a loud voice, saying, 'How long, O Lord, holy and true, until You judge and avenge our blood on those who dwell on the earth?' Then a white robe was given to each of them; and it was said to them that they should rest a little while longer, until both the number of their fellow servants and their brethren, who would be killed as they were, was completed" (Revelation 6:9-11).

"Being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ" (Philippians 1:6).

Prayers for December 6, 2005
From The Voice of the Martyrs

EGYPT (Compass Direct)
Hany Samir Tawfik, a 29-year-old Egyptian Copt, has been released from jail after being held without charges for 28 months. He was set free June 28th, from Gharbaliat Prison near Alexandria. His release came seven months after his case was first publicized outside Egypt. He had been arrested by Egypt's State Security Investigation (SSI) authorities on March 3, 2003. A Coptic Christian who had gone to Saudi Arabia to work, Tawfik was deported back to Egypt in the summer of 2002, after requesting asylum from the U.S. Embassy in Riyadh. He was promptly detained for interrogation at Cairo's notorious SSI headquarters but released after 52 days. Seven months later, Tawfik was again arrested under unknown accusations.

Thank God for his release. Pray Tawfik will continue to seek a closer walk with Jesus and be the fragrance of Christ to everyone he meets.


INDONESIA (ASSIST News Service)
VOM recently reported that on November 8th, two girls were attacked on their way to a Christian school. Christian Solidarity Worldwide (CSW) reports Siti Nuraini, 17, a Muslim, died in Poso Kota general hospital November 9th. Her Christian friend Ivon, also 17, remains in critical condition. This incident closely followed the beheading of three Christian schoolgirls on October 29th, and represented a further escalation of violence. The Reverend Rinaldy Damanik, Moderator for the Central Sulawesi Christian Reform Church, and Chairman of the Central Sulawesi Churches Crisis Co-ordination Centre, has been in close contact with Christians and government officials in Sulawesi and has appealed for a stop to the violence. He stressed security officials needed to act promptly to ensure those guilty of the attacks are brought to justice and also to try and prevent further attacks. As reported in the Jakarta Post, Presidential spokesman Andi Mallarangeng said the President had ordered security forces to bring the perpetrators to justice and urged residents not to launch revenge.

Pray the family and friends of Siti Nuraini will long for the love and mercy of Jesus. Pray the Lord Jesus will touch Ivon with His healing power. Pray God will use this attack to build His Kingdom and their suffering will not be in vain.

An international Christian human rights organization is urging the immediate release of three wrongly accused Indonesian Christian Sunday school teachers who have lost their appeal to overturn charges. This means a three-year prison term for the women—Dr. Rebekka Zakaria, Eti Pangesti and Ratna Bangun. They are currently serving a three-year prison sentence in the Indramayu district of West Java, having been wrongly convicted of "attempting to coerce children to change their religion" under the Indonesian "Child Protection Act." Christian Freedom International (CFI), reports that on November 22, 2005, the three Sunday school teachers lost an important appeal to have their sentences reduced or overturned by a higher court.

Pray God will soften the heart of the judge who will hear the next appeal, giving him compassion for these innocent women. Pray they will be comforted and made aware of the many people who are praying for them. Pray the Lord will minister to the children while their teachers are in prison.


IRAN (VOM-USA)
An Iranian Christian convert was kidnapped from his home in northeastern Iran last week and stabbed to death. His bleeding body was thrown in front of his home a few hours later. Ghorban Tori, 50, was pastoring an independent house church of converted Christians in Gonbad-e-Kavus. Within hours of the November 22nd murder, local secret police arrived at the pastor's home, searching for Bibles and other banned Christian books written in the Farsi language. According to one source, during the past eight days representatives of the Ministry of Intelligence and Security (MOIS) have arrested and severely tortured 10 other Christians in several cities, including Tehran. (Click here for original story posted on 12-05-2005, for most recent update, click here.)

Pray the Lord will comfort Tori's family and friends. Pray Christians in Iran will continue courageously, boldly and lovingly, confident in their Savior. Pray the Holy Spirit will move in victorious power to overcome the forces of evil in Iran.


RUSSIA (Religion Today)
The Russian government reports that within the coming weeks it may begin tightening control of foreign missionaries and religious organizations. According to reports, the Justice Ministry is considering adopting stricter rules on granting visas to foreign missionaries—an action that, if effective, would lead to the limitation of missionaries to Russia. The government also expressed plans to make the suppression of religious centers easier while causing registration of religious organizations more difficult. "It sounds like it's all going back like it was during the Soviet time," commented Sergey Rakhuba, vice president of Russian Ministries. He believes the Russian Orthodox Church is involved in the proposal. Rakhuba states: "Even if restrictions on foreign missionaries are forthcoming, church growth and evangelism in Russia will not be hindered. I don't think that it will affect evangelism because you cannot stop people from talking about Christ. You cannot stop people talking about their experiences with Jesus. And that's what Russian Ministries is doing."

Pray God will lead the foreign missionaries to begin intensive training and discipling of Russian believers to be pastors and evangelists among their own people. Pray the Holy Spirit will move in power in the Russian Orthodox Church, bringing many to know the joy of their salvation. Pray Russian Christians will be bold and loving as they share with others their experiences with Jesus.

this week...so far...

so far,

it's going great!

if anything i am finding that the things i am worrying and praying about

are others and not finals... i am doing some of both for finals, but mainly i am doing them and studying for them and taking them! i am worried mostly for Cole; Brent and Summer's son - aka YoungLife leaders... he has some eye problems and now there seems to be another problem in regards to his eyes/vision/etc. it makes me sad to see such a little guy go through pain, it makes me sad to see his parents sad...:*( i am a spiritually emo guy, what can ya say?

well...

i am working at this time

library-wise.

not to busy

and

just the usual in regards to library stuff...

my YouthMin paper is shaping up!

i cranked out 9 pages by hand and typed up it's 8...for now, i think i can make it a 10-pager...

so all is good

and

i cannot wait to sloooow down for a while.

perhaps i'll get a CHRISTmas job

but if anything, i want to sleep...

sleep a good 24 hours straight-

i know i have it in me to do so, but finals makes my sleeping habits awry.

ttyl and GOD bless,
[nv]
p.s. i played my first CHRISTmas song this season! Happy Christmas (War is over) by John Lennon... yeah, there i go; gothic, peacenick, youthmin major...*sigh and smile*

of elvis and johnny...

earlier when i was shopping for some white elephant stuff i started talking to this guy who was looking in the same area as i was for vinyl/records... we had a wonderful conversation and he mentioned he didn't need any more elvis because his wife "has it all anyways". i mentioned what did he think of elvis' gospel tunes - just to get the conversation rolling onto something spiritual...if he was willing. he was, and he thought it was good religiously and christianly, and then he asked my opinion. now i like elvis gospel stuff, but not much besides that, i let him know that and i also mentioned johnny cash's style in regards to gospel music and how it was a different kind of good- he agreed... he went away with johnny mathis' christmas album which he highly recommends and after another brief conversation we parted ways...
it was really fun to find out what someone thinks about GOD in a conversation not about GOD... i may have stirred something, but only GOD knows the answer to that one and the man's heart in general-
GOD is making me more of the extrovert
and less of the introvert...
~facades fading and shifting shadows~
*nv*

lyrics to a good song...

near sighted girl with approaching Tidal Wave

Up in her room she gets out of the sack
Goes down to the beach and lies on her back
In the sunshine all day, what's the hurry?

She dreams of long youth, no wrinkles or fat
No thoughts of bedpans or deathbeds
And that keeps her smiling all day, what's the hurry?

An older woman suddenly cried, "The tide is rising!"
And all the guys with speedos made it first to their cars
But along with the rest she slept while the crest rose
Twenty feet and higher, higher...

The girl kept on dreaming of a honeymoon in France
A handsome fiance and the way he could dance

Nuestra luna de miel, oye vaco mansando
Devina mujer estamos besando bailando el swim
He made good money alright a bright future

Even the guys with muscles cried, "The tide is rising!"
And all the folks with porsches made it up to the cliffs
A group of kids were praying that I'm sure went up to heaven
But no one tried to surf...

It's a tidal wave, it's a watery grave
She really tried to swim, she couldn't in the end.

Words and Music by Terry Taylor
©1980 Cancel and Eat (ASCAP)

how often we dream about the plans of the future (not necessarily wrong) when we don't know what a day will bring... we should make plans, but the one who guides all our plans is GOD- we should worry about what lies ahead but not to the point of exhaustion...

all i can say is...

this is funny/odd/not funny all at the same time...

:::nv:::

give me warm weather...another poem!

give me skies of blue,

skies that haven't given birth to snow...

i am interested in florida

i am interested in cali.

i am interested in arizona

just-for-the-sake-of-a-warmer-climate

even-though-i-have-family-in-all-three-places
***
a

former

selfish prayer

comes to mind
.
LORD, let me be a youth pastor;

take me anywhere

as long as it is somewhere warm,

where it does not snow

or gets below seventy degrees fahrenheit-
AMEN!

i want to be back on the beach

like i was last year;

the gulf of mexico,

mid eighties temp. wise

and

it was in january...
***
*sigh*
i want to leave soon,

this cold is getting to me...
[nv]

my melancholiness/catch-22...a poem.

almost

over

the semester, that is...

how i yearn to be with those i love

but alas...it's a catch-22 scenario:

those i call family, i want my distance from

those i call friends, i want to get closer
*sigh*

with this melancholy nature ever end?
i don't want it to end, so that's another catch-22.
my

life

is

*currently*

catch-22's:

it won't end any time soon,

but...eventually i'll want to be with my family

and

it'll be dreadful if that is when i go back to school
:P

GOD is good in many ways, here's one example...

:)

coming out of the cafeteria, i heard them before i saw them - sandhill cranes... there must have been between 80 to 100 in flight; higher than geese dare to fly... soon Barb, Justin and Jeff came out and they saw them to; it was something fun to see with friends such as these...
i thought of my favorite traditional Japanese song; Tsuru no Sugomori - tenderness/nesting of the cranes...

such a lovely piece of music,
such lovely birds,
such lovely times...
{nv}

if i had a [music] weapon of choice

...i wish i knew how to play...
*dreaming of electric guitar by osmosis*
[nv]

the ocean, my soul...

how placid it can be at times,
how tumultuous it can be as well.
my soul; lost at sea since i was born,
only rescued after finding GOD-
but alas... i am adrift.

how i cry out;
my tears are the ocean
or at least it's what keeps me away from you-
what can be done?
except...
i don't know
or
i won't tell myself what can be done
and so i remain adrift...
*when will i ever find land?*

the american dream...a poem.

in my life...
apart from GOD...
i could have easily made the 'american dream' come true;
fast cars, women, houses, vacations, wealth and more.
apart from GOD
i could have done everything to please myself, but in the end, i would remain empty...
apart from GOD
i could never be poor
i could separate myself from all that i hate
i could have walked away from my family forever...

but i am a follower of Christ,
life is different
life is better-
thank GOD i am a follower of him,
it is a hard and long road,
but the road apart from him is harder...
i
will
never
be
the
ideal
or
the
average
because
i
am
a
follower
of
GOD
{nv}

midnight melancholic...a poem.

as i sit
and do nothing productive
i look
i gaze
at people and their trivial,round-the-bend lives...

i want to break free
and
seperate myself from what weighs on and against me
but i am fading the façade of self
i am burning the façade things that i need to remove
shadows shift,
and i am here alone with GOD...

he knows my heart
and
my desire to change
and
the things that keep me down
can
only keep me down for so long.
i am bent,
but not broken.
i go on by GOD's strength alone...
:::NV:::

gah...i want to go now!

well...my finals are coming up and in my moment of a break, i have found these pics online...































i want to go to Japan, China, etc... not for a short time, but a longer time. perhaps one of these semesters i can take it abroad...:)
*while i type this, i am considering those i'd miss...:(*

so i am on facebook...

Facebook me!

whatever...it's the american game i tell ya!
how so,
well...i'll blog later
i am in math and i
am waiting for a paper
to be printed up and
now i must get back
to math or else i'll die...

eat your heart out hemingway!
***nv***