This poem speaks to me on multiple levels; in regards to how selfish I am, how much I want to pursue God, how much I don't measure up and yet... God continues to love me, etc.
This became a song by Phil Keaggy in 1976, it is beautifully done and it is a flash from my past... It was the first tape I ever owned and because my tape wore out quickly, I bought 2 copies of Love Broke Thru on Vinyl! It takes me back... Farther than I should go in regards to memories - A lot of good happened back then, but also a lot of bad (which I rather not blog about).

As the Ruin Falls

All this is flashy rhetoric about loving you. I never had a selfless thought since I was born. I am mercenary and self-seeking through and through: I want God, you, all friends, merely to serve my turn. Peace, re-assurance, pleasure, are the goals I seek, I cannot crawl one inch outside my proper skin: I talk of love --a scholar's parrot may talk Greek-- But, self-imprisoned, always end where I begin. Only that now you have taught me (but how late) my lack. I see the chasm. And everything you are was making My heart into a bridge by which I might get back From exile, and grow man. And now the bridge is breaking. For this I bless you as the ruin falls. The pains You give me are more precious than all other gains. C S Lewis